ok Woah! slow down there kids! it all got a bit crowded in my netheadthing,,, too many voices. so why the comment thing? no me gusto. my writing is absolutely superior to anything you could possibly say about it. i spurn your comments. comment on THAT fuckface.

2nd day of work experience over and i must say that i didnt write yesterday because i was recovering from bile poisoning. no not really, that was a euphemism for the impotent rage i felt when i was patronised abused mocked and yelled at on my first day. i also did not get any food. grrr. today was much better and involved me tracking down various people currently making headlines and passing their details on to someone better able to handle them than i. i was jealous of the trolley woman who walks past twice a day and yells 'trolley' at the top of her voice. i bet no-one yells at her...

at any rate it went fine and quickly and was actually enjoyable though i am wondering whether the enjoyment was actually only relative in comparison to yesterday. either way though twas good.

i secured me a place at reading with minimal effort mwahaha. mucho thanks to el juste for mentioning my name to sean as available to work the respect festival this saturday. cue text from sean asking me to work saturday and offering reading as a thank you. purrrrrr. purr purr purr. ok so its not glasto. but - apart from grilly - none of u will be having as fun a weekend as me that weekend :p

if i could access my email account i would probably have a lot more to write about but silkymail is being twattish. so i must content myself - and you - with more remarks on the subject of my work experience... humourous event of the day: my deputy editor attempting to speak in german to a german company that specialises in covering for married men when they have affairs. oh the chortles in the office were a joy to hear.

anyway, on account of working the respect malarky this sat i will be returning to brighton later than previously expected. which means its up to YOU to start looking for a house. get off your ass u lazy dogturd and start looking. good. do not miss me too much mon amigos as i will be back on saturday night..

i should also declare that i spent half an hour today looking up army sex scandals. i was actually really disspointed when NO porn sites came up on the search. what are you all doing with your time?! get out there and start filming some dirty corporal sex! (after youve looked for a house that is...)

jess