some bastard has sent me a virus that orevents me from replying to emails, to both my personal AND the editorial account. 'come back my friend' it says. yeah, come back here motherfucker and ill show you whats what. thats what. yet another setback to the journalism process... against all odds i shall produce a paper this week. and then i will dominate the world! aha ha ha.

today has been exquisite, chill with nik, gabriel, joel and cecilia, listening to esther sing - heard bout it 5 mins before, a beautiful spontaneous act to go and listen and be at peace to her own music. she is so talented, it must be amazing to have the courage to do that. i want to. maybe i will... adventures by the pond, seeing joe-my-husband, seeing joe-my-non-husband, sadness from the icarus proj and hope at the same time, some juice, some coffee with coops - are all the jobs going to oxbridge grads? and will we ever be good/successful journos? and a tiffin (rarr first of the year)....

my course man has failed to put our 'reader' - how american - into the bookshop so i must go unprepared to the seminar. grrr. but less to read and less to stress.

to mr scruff or not to mr scruff? the posse is heading out tonight, rolling out the wagons and wearing our best sunday hats. a house dinner is called for but i have only a bag of spinach. seemed to be all popeye ate tho and he did pretty well.

it has poured and it has shone. i went to pick up my scooter today and its petrol pipe has a leak so i couldnt drive. grrr. and yet again i say, grrr.

waiting for a lift from harriet the education officer. maybe i should start buying bus singles, i seem to be winging plenty of lifts home this week. a chat with kate looms. we seem to bo9th be uncertain about our desires and our fears. where to from here? i feel a certain absence of light with regards to this. i wish someone could tell me how i feel, how to feel, how to express what i dont know.

suggestions, comments, abuse. type it.

and remember the similarity between fighting and writing. all who write are revolutionaries.

jess
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